Overwhelmed

I am SO overwhelmed. PLEASE pray for me! But this is a good overwhelmed, I have SEVERAL job offers to take into consideration and I must say GOD IS GOOD! I have an interview (over the phone with the family) for a nanny position. This family just moved to the area and the mother needs some help with her young children during the school year M-W. She is willing to pay $10/hr plus gas reimbursement. I think this would be a fun job, but I'm concerned about what I would do AFTER the school year. Next, the food service coordinator (aka Mary, my boss) offered me a supervisor position in the dining room where I'm working VERY part time now. And if for whatever reason, the guy who is managing nights at the cafe summer can't do it, I would be the night manager for the Huck. Also, at the same conference center, the front desk manager offered me a position as night auditor. I would work 3 nights every other week and 2 nights during the weeks in between. He will pay me $8/hr with a potential raise. This said.... he knows I want to go back to school and said that I would be FREE to do homework and study while at work. There aren't a lot of things to do during the night shift but they HAVE to have someone on duty at all times. AND I can still work in childcare during the summer for $10.75/hr like I planned on doing. So I'm leaning towards that job.... but it's still a tough call! So please be praying for me!

Free to be Me

Usually, music is what inspires me and music is how God speaks to me. Well, today is no exception. Last night I heard this song, 'Free to be Me' by Francesca Battistelli and the words are perfect, they totally describe my life. But isn't that usually how it goes? LOL! Here are the lyrics:

At twenty years of age I'm still looking for a dream

A war's already waged for my destiny

But You've already won the battle

And You've got great plans for me

Though I can’t always see

Chorus)

‘Cause I got a couple dents in my fender

Got a couple rips in my jeans

Try to fit the pieces together

But perfection is my enemy

On my own I'm so clumsy

But on Your shoulders I can see

I'm free to be me

When I was just a girl I thought I had it figured out

My life would turn out right, and I'd make it here somehow

But things don't always come that easy

And sometimes I would doubt

(Repeat Chorus)

And you're free to be you

Sometimes I believe that I can do anything

Yet other times I think I've got nothing good to bring

But You look at my heart and You tell me

That I've got all You seek A

nd it’s easy to believe

Even though

(Repeat Chorus)

That's my life right now. I'm twenty years old, I'm not perfect, I'm still looking for who I am and who I want to be.... but I know that through Him.... I'm free to be me. I'm definately not someone who tries to fit in or goes along with the crowd. I've always been the type to rebel when it came to choices that my friends made. I'm not as rebellious when it comes to my clothes anymore.... thank goodness! I make choices for me now, and I've stopped caring whether or not someone thinks I'm cool or if they think I'm wierd. I am who I am, I stutter and stumble over my words sometimes, I play guitar and sing... even though sometimes I think I'm pretty horrible at it. I like to sew and knit, I even like to play video games on my husbands xbox and on my ds. I am just me. I might not be what anyone else thinks I should be.... but through God's amazing love and grace... I am FREE TO BE ME.

My Desire

We are struggling. I am struggling. With bills, with not being able to find a job, with no privacy, with no home. With letting God take control. I am scared we've dug ourselves this huge hole and can't find our way out. Every time we turn around something new pops up. A new bill, a new problem. I know my Lord can bring me through anything... so why is it so hard to let go and let HIM? I can't take this anymore! I need to find peace.

So I got into the car this morning and this song came on. One of my favorites.... but you know how you listen to music all the time and sometimes just don't "hear" the lyrics. Well I HEARD them this morning.

My Desire

Jeremy Camp
You want to be real, you want to be empty inside

You want to be someone laying down your pride

You want to be someone someday

Then lay it all down before the king

You want to be whole, you want to have purpose inside

You want to have virtue and purify your mind

You want to be set free today

Then lay it all down before the King

This is my desire, this is my return

This is my desire to be used by You

You want to be real, you want to be empty inside

And I know my heart is to feel

You near

And I know my life

It's to do Your will

It's to do Your will

This is my desire, this is my return

This is my desire, to be used by You

Oo yea

This is my desire, this is my desire

To be used by You

All my life I have seen

Where You've taken me

Beyond all I have hoped

And there's more left unseen

There's not much I can do to repay all You've done

So I give my hands to use

This is my desire, this is my return

This is my desire, to be used by You

Oo yea

This is my desire, this is my desire

To be used by You

I WANT to lay down my pride and lay it down before HIM.

I'll be found in You.

Shadowfeet

Walking, stumbling on these shadowfeet

Toward home; a land that I've never seen.

I am changing: less and less asleep

Made of different stuff than when I began

And I have sensed it all along

Fast approaching is the day.

[chorus]

When the world has fallen out from under me

I'll be found in you, still standing

When the sky rolls up and mountains fall on their knees

When time and space are through

I'll be found in you

There's distraction... buzzing in my head

Saying in the shadows it's easier to stay

But I've heard rumors of true reality

Whispers of a well-lit way

[chorus]
When the world has fallen out from under me
I'll be found in you, still standing
When the sky rolls up and mountains fall on their knees
When time and space are through
I'll be found in you

You make all things new x5

[chorus 2]

When the world has fallen out from under me

I'll be found in you, still standing

Every fear and accusation under my feet

When time and space are through

I'll be found in you

I come back to this song EVERY day. A lot has been happening in mine and Justin's lives lately.... but I can always be found in Christ. When the world is falling underneath my feet..... I'll be found in YOU Jesus.... and I'll be standing. When the sky is rolling and the mountains fall to their knees.... I'll be found in YOU. Forever and always.... every moment of everyday... I know I can find myself in You. I am blessed. Lord, am I blessed.

Long Time No Write!

It's been almost a month since I posted & A LOT has happened.... so let me sum it up for you.

- I got laid off in December & COULD NOT for the life of me find another job in TN
- Justin's hours got cut DURING Christmas.... who does that when you work in retail?
- We packed our bags & moved back to NC
- We are living with the inlaws..... that's a story for another day. UGH.
- Justin is working at the nursing home he was @ before we moved to TN; which is also the place my Granny lives
- I JUST found out... like a few hours ago.... that I have a job in the conference center, in the dining room, where I worked in high school part time. It's a good job, but they don't offer any benefits or full time.... but it's a job for now!
- I am talking to a lady who works at the local grocery warehouse in accounts receivable about a job there, which IS full time and offers AMAZING benefits


I think that sums it up right? I'm sure I'll be back later to update some more.... but that's all for now!

I don't have a verse today.... I just wanted to say GOD IS GOOD.

If We Are the Body...

Lately, my life has been a reality rollercoaster. I got laid off from my job, my husband's hours have been cut short at work.... and we just really want to go home. I've been so focused on trying to figure out what I needed to do to make our lives better... but I forgot that the only way things will get better is if I lay them down before the Lord. And then I started thinking... what kind of example am I setting for my friends and family? Freaking out, stressing and complaining isn't showing them that I'm focused on my Father... it's doing nothing but show them that I don't count on him. So what did I do? I pulled out my guitar, sat at the computer and searched for some music. If you don't know by now, but the best way for me to get closer to my Lord is to just praise Him with my voice. Eventually, I found one of my favorite songs... "If We are the Body" by Casting Crowns. It's an AMAZING song. It talks about two individuals who just want to fit in but feel like that the other people in church just won't accept them... and the chorus goes on to say that if we are part of Christ, and if we are part of His body.... why aren't we teaching them what He's all about? Why aren't we treating them like Jesus would have? Wow. What a reality check right? Here are the lyrics:

V1
It's crowded in worship today
As she slips in... trying to fade into the faces
The girls teasing laughter is carrying
Farther than they know
Farther than they know, Lord

Chorus
But if we are the body
Why aren't His arms reaching?
Why aren't His hands healing?
Why aren't His words teaching?
And if we are the body
Why aren't His feet going?
Why is His love not showing them there is a way?
There is a way.

V2
A traveler is far away from home
He sheds his coat
And quietly sinks into the back row
The weight of their judgmental glances
Tells him that his chances
are better out on the road

Bridge
Jesus paid much too high a price
For us to pick and choose who should come
And we are the bo - - -dy of Christ

Chorus
But if we are the body
Why aren't His arms reaching?
Why aren't His hands healing?
Why aren't His words teaching?
And if we are the body
Why aren't His feet going?
Why is His love not showing them there is a way?
There is a way.
Jesus is the way.

Let me repeat that..... JESUS IS THE WAY.

A Time For Thanksgiving

Holy Crow. Can you believe that tomorrow is Thanksgiving? I sure can't! This year had FLOWN by! It seems like we were just planning on our big move to TN & we were just moving our stuff into the apartment.... and here we are almost to 2009! I can't believe it! It's amazing how time flies, it's almost bittersweet!

Well, so many things are happening in mine and Justin's lives right now. Obviously, tomorrow is Thanksgiving, so the inlaws are coming in to share that with us. I'll be running errands, cleaning, washing the dog & cooking tonight so that there will be less to do tomorrow. BUT I'm VERY stressed.... more than very... COMPLETELY stressed. EEEK!

Tuesday, December 2nd, my amazing husband is turning 22.... seriously?!?!?! How about another... EEEEK! He continues to amaze me - he is such an incredible man and an even more incredible husband. He makes my life just that much more amazing! We will be spending his birthday in North Carolina, hopefully making pit stops to see friends and family. But what I'm excited about is seeing TWILIGHT!!!! YAY!!!!!!! I'm so excited! I've been waiting and waiting and I even reread the Twilight Saga last week (yes, all 4 books in 1 week) so I'd be ready to go! Justin wants to go to our favorite Mexican restaraunt, Las Cazuelas, which is also where we had our first date on 2.14.06.

Other than that.... Christmas is coming soon, and I'm hoping to have a new sewing machine sitting in my home so I can start sewing up a storm! I want to make a lot of the crafts I've seen on Jill's Website, http://www.homemadebyjill.blogspot.com. She has made and found some of the coolest crafts EVER! I don't have any children right now, but eventually I will and she has some CUTE stuff - bibs, burp clothes... all kinds of cuteness! You should totally check it out!

Anyways, I also wanted to ask if you would pray for my mom and her side of the family this week. A year ago, on Thanksgiving Day, my maternal grandfather passed away. He was an AMAZING man, and my mom misses him more then I could ever explain. Please keep everyone in your prayers!

Have a happy Thanksgiving!!!

There's an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:

A right time for birth and another for death,

A right time to plant and another to reap,

A right time to kill and another to heal,

A right time to destroy and another to construct,

A right time to cry and another to laugh,

A right time to lament and another to cheer,

A right time to make love and another to abstain,

A right time to embrace and another to part,

A right time to search and another to count your losses,

A right time to hold on and another to let go,

A right time to rip out and another to mend,

A right time to shut up and another to speak up,

A right time to love and another to hate,

A right time to wage war and another to make peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Garlic Chicken Pizza

We've made this yummy pizza several times, and so I thought I'd share the recipe! For the crust, I recommend the pillsbury dough, you can find it with the canned biscuits and croissants.

Ingredients:

Pizza Dough/Crust (we used a premade crust for this pizza)

1/2 cup butter

1/2 cup garlic powder

1 cup parmesan

1 cup mozzerella

2 tablespoons parsley

2 tablespoons basil

1/2 cup diced tomatoes

1/2 small onion sliced thinly

1/2 green pepper sliced thinly

1 chicken breast, diced

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees F.

First, dice your chicken and toss with 1 tablespoon basil, 1 tablespoon parsley, 1/4 cup garlic powder, and 1/2 cup parmesan. Throw on the grill on low heat. Next, slice your onion & pepper and grill these beside your chicken. Drain your diced tomatoes (we use the canned version) of any excess fluid and toss with your veggies.

Meanwhile, in a small frying pan, mix your butter, remaining garlic powder, basil, parsley and 1/4 cup parmesan over low heat. There will be enough for your pizza sauce AND to dip your pizza in.

Once your sauce is melted, pour over your pizza crust (not too much or you'll have a soggy crust).

Next, add your veggies & chicken - doesn't have to look pretty! LOL

Then add your mozzerella and the remaining parmesan.

Cook until your crust is browned (lift the pizza with a spatula to check center) and your cheese is melted. Slice and enjoy :)

Booooooring.

Seriously. Seriously? I have gotten EXACTLY 12 calls at work today, ALL for Thanksgiving. New flash.... we have 3 cabins left. All are one bedroom, and they all ONLY accommodate 2 people. No we cannot squeeze 3 in, no we cannot guarantee we will have cancellations.... maybe next year you'll book a cabin in September rather then 2 weeks prior to Thanksgiving? It's sooooo boring today. I'm currently watching Dr. Doolittle 2 on ABC Family, texting my amazing husband & reading blogs. I lead SUCH an exciting life!

So yea..... now I'm just wasting time wishing i had something interesting to post about...... nope nothing. Maybe tomorrow will be more interesting!

Fever

I'm not entirely sure who reads this blog. I know for a fact that my beautiful friend Janelle does and that a few girls from the BBC do. I don't even know how to track how many views I get, but that is FAR beyond the point, lol. I have a fever. Not a temperature fever, but a baby/craft/cleaning/baking fever. Pretty crazy right? I have HORRIBLE baby fever, every where I turn there are babies and pregnant women. EVERYWHERE. I also have craft fever... I have this NEED to cross stitch and sew... HELLO! I'm turning into my mother, what will I do? I also have cleaning fever - you should have seen my house when our families came to see us. ABSOLUTELY spotless. Seriously. I got EVERY nook and cranny. I am NOT a cleaning person, I despise cleaning actually. And right now, sitting at work... the clutter is driving me INSANE! I also have baking fever.... I've been baking like crazy! I made a white cake with sprinkles in the batter, topped with buttercream icing and rainbow sprinkles... YUM. I also recently made cuppy cakes that were absolutely scrumptious. I've made cookies and brownies.... and I bought MORE ingredients to make more cake this weekend. YIKES!

So enough of my multitude of obsessions, I've been feeling pretty yucky lately. As I sit here writing this at my desk I'm feeling nauseus and achy and my head is THROBBING. And I think I should apologize for the multitude of CAPS I've used. So I guess I'll leave you with this... and stop writing for not only my sanity but yours....

“For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive by the Spirit,”
- 1 Peter 3:18