My Precious Grandmother

Lillian is my grandmother, if you could see pictures of her from her teens - twenties, you'd say she was a beautiful woman. She had long, silky black hair and kind caring eyes. She may not be as young as she used to be, but now that she's in her seventies.... I still think she's one of the most beautiful women I have ever met. My Granny has several medical issues, both physical and mentally. My parents believe that she may have had fetal alcohol syndrome, along with most of her brothers and sisters. That sounds horrible, but when "Little Granny" (my grandmother's mother) started having kids, she was 14 and they didn't know anything about the effects of alcohol on a baby. Granny is schizophrenic, she started showing signs of dementia when I was in high school. She has always had short term memory loss, but when the dementia started showing symptoms, it was much more obvious. At one point, I took care of her 3 days a week, I gave her baths, made sure she had EDIBLE food to eat, and that her house was clean. This year, our family decided that it was time to put her in a nursing home because we could no longer be there, by her side, 24/7. My grandmother, being her usual stubborn self, fell last night trying to move from her wheelchair to her bed... in SOCKS. Regular old slippery socks and she fell and bonked her head on the floor. The nurses from the nursing home called 911, because they were worried about her head injury, her speech was slurring and she was disoriented. They ran tests at the hospital and said she was fine, but noticed some tremors in her hands.... so now they suspect she may be in the early stages of Parkinson's. My precious grandmother, my beautiful, amazing Granny who raised 4 amazing people, and is the most loving, generous Christian woman I've ever met. When will she cut a break? Why does she have to suffer so much? I just don't understand it. I can't even be there for her.... I'm sure I've rambled enough... but please pray for her. Lillian Elizabeth deserves better, she gives so much love and she still suffers.

Cupcake Bites/CuppyCakes!

Bakerella is a new favorite blog of mine, you can see her blog in my "favorites" ------>
I tried out her bakery cuteness.... here are some pictures:

In case you can't tell. These cuppycakes are about an inch tall!

Crunchy Stuffed Baked Chicken Parmesan!

Yes.... its all of the above and it's DELICIOUS! And I came up with it by myself. OOOOOOOOo yes. Here's what you need:

2 Chicken Breasts (or more..... depending on your family size)
2 cups of Plain Corn Flakes
2 egg whites
1/4 cup milk (buttermilk is best)
Mrs. Dash (I suggest the original)
1 Tspn Chipotle Pepper
2 Tspn Adobe Seasoning (you can find this with the Mexican foods/seasonings)
A pinch of cinnamon
1/2 cup of parmesan
2 cups of Mozzerella Cheese (shredded)
1 cup of Spaghetti Sauce (i like traditional)

First, prepare your chicken breasts by taking either a pair of meat scissors or a knife and cutting an opening large enough for 2 fingers (you will stuff mozzerella & seasonings into the chicken breast). Once your chicken is cut & ready, mix 1 cup of mozzerella & some Mrs. Dash (your preference to how much) in a small bowl. Stuff half of the mixture into each Chicken Breast. Set the chicken aside.

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees.

Prepare your breading. Crush your cornflakes, you can leave them larger, but I like my cornflakes crushed finely. Mix the cornflakes, a fair amount of Mrs. Dash, the Adobe seasoning, Chipotle Pepper, Cinnamon, & 1/4 parmesan. In another bowl mix the egg whites & milk.

Spray the pan you'll be cooking your chicken in and make an "assembly line". Chicken first, egg white/milk mixture second, Breading mixture third & finally your greased pan. Dip your stuffed chicken into the egg/milk mixture and then roll it around in the breading mixture. Cover your chicken thoroughly. Place on your pan and stick it in the oven. Usually takes 30-45 minutes depending on the size of your chicken breast. My general rule is to slice the largest chicken breast at the 30 minute mark to see how done they are.

Once the chicken is cooked, pull the pan out and smother it with your remaining cheeses & spaghetti sauce. Place back in the oven just long enough for the cheese to melt and the sauce to get hot.

Serve with a salad & breadsticks and you've got a tasty meal!

I'll post pics later (maybe!)

I Need to Vent

I am so frustrated right now. I finally found this great job that I actually enjoy going to everyday, I love our apartment, I have an amazing husband... I love this place. But guess what. My husband, ya know the guy who started this whole "Let's move to TN" shindig.... he's not happy. He hates his job, he hates this place and he's homesick. I TOLD him this would happen, I TOLD him he would get homesick because the fact of the matter is.... HE'S A MOMMA'S BOY. I love my husband so much, but this is so ridiculous. I don't know what to do. We can't just pick up and leave now. But I want him to be happy... but I want to be happy too.

Who Am I?

"Who Am I"

by Casting Crowns

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth

Would care to know my name

Would care to feel my hurt

Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star

Would choose to light the way

For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am

But because of what You've done

Not because of what I've done

But because of who You're

I am a flower quickly fading

Here today and gone tomorrow

A wave tossed in the ocean

A vapor in the wind

Still You hear me when I'm calling

Lord, You catch me when I'm falling

And You've told me who I am

I am Yours, I am Yours

Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin

Would look on me with love and watch me rise again

Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea

Would call out through the rain

And calm the storm in me

I am Yours

Whom shall I fear

Whom shall I fear

'Cause I am Yours

I am Yours

Another great song, Who am I that Lord would care to know MY name and to feel MY hurt. Why do I deserve that? Why should HE care? I think we all ask ourselves that now and then. I know I do. It's amazing to think that He took the time to create me and to design every detail of who I am. He created me in HIS image, carefully, lovingly and compassionately. He loves me for who I am. Does that give you chills like it does me?

The end of the song is my favorite... Whom shall I fear? Because I am YOURS. Why should I be afraid when I know God is protecting me? What a powerful statement! I don't have much to say, except this. Remember that God created You, and that He created you with a purpose. You may not know what your purpose is just yet, like me, but He has a plan for you. Do not fear this world and the barricades Satan shoves infront of you. BREAK THROUGH THE BARRICADES and allow God to show you the way :)

Long Overdue!

2 Corinthians 5:7 says, "We live by faith, not by sight."

Jeremy Camp's song entitled, "Walk by Faith" is one of my favorite songs. Here are the lyrics:

Will I believe you when you say

Your hand will guide my every way

Will I receive the words You say

Every moment of every day

Well I will walk by faith

Even when I cannot see

Because this broken road

Prepares Your will for me

Help me to RID my endless fears

You've been so faithful for all my years

With the one breath You make me new

Your grace covers all I do yeah, yeah , yeah, yeah, ya

Well I will walk by faith

Even when I cannot see

Because this broken road

Prepares your will for me

Well I'm broken- but I still see Your face

Well You've spoken- pouring Your words of grace

Well I will walk by faith

Even when I cannot see

Well because this broken road

Prepares Your will for me

(Repeat)

Well I will walk by faith

Even when I cannot see

Well because this broken road

Prepares Your will for me

Hallelujah, hallelu

I will walk by faith,

I will walk by faith....

I struggle with that sometimes... we must WALK BY FAITH and NOT BY SIGHT. I have to believe that Jesus is with me everyday, walking this walk with me, taking this journey with me even though I can't see Him. I am long overdue for an update, and I thought this was the perfect oppurtunity to share that song. It's been a little over a month now since I last blogged and since I moved into our new home, to a new state and new town. It's kind of surreal, but its starting to grow on me. I miss my family a lot, but I know this is going to help me grow as a person, in my relationship with my husband, and in my relationship with Christ. I finally found a new job, it's at a local cabin rental company, they have some BEAUTIFUL cabins. If you'd like the link, let me know, I'll be happy to show you some of the cabins we offer :)

Justin is still at Walmart, I'm so glad that I got out of that place. I will NEVER work in retail again! Justin's also been having a lot of problems with his truck, but we got that worked out today and we're taking it to get it fixed tomorrow. God is MIGHTY!

And we also celebrated our first wedding anniversary on September 15th... actually the DAY of our anniversary SUCKED, but the past week in NC was very nice. We hung out with both of our families, spent a day in Asheville just piddling around and went out to eat. We went to the same restaurant Justin took me to on our first date, which was on Valentine's Day of 2006. It's a great little Mexican Restaraunt in our hometown, and we haven't found another one we like better!

I guess that's it for now, a lot more has happened, but if I went back and tried to tell you everything that happened this month you'd be reading an entire book! God Bless!

Reassurance

Well, I'm finally in TN... and TERRIFIED! I'm excited and overwhelmed, and praying that I get that job at the lawfirm this week. I want a really good job like I had before (even though I really hated my last job, it was a well paying job)... and Walmart just isn't going to cut it. Walmarts NOT a bad place to work, don't get me wrong, because my husband works there. I just don't want to work there, I want to work somewhere that pays A LOT better and that has good benefits sooner than later! Well I've been thinking about this a lot, and Justin's worried to death about the bills we have to pay in the next few weeks and I came across these lyrics in an old songbook of mine... I don't know who the artist is, but whoever they are... thank you for this wisdom.

I Have Decided

[author unknown]

V1

There's a wealth of things that I professed, I said that I believed,

But deep inside I never changed -- I guess I've been deceived

'Cause a voice inside kept telling me that I changed by and by,

But the Spirit made it clear to me: that kind of life's a lie.

Chorus

I have decided: I'm gonna live like a believer,

Turn my back on the Deceiver. I'm gonna live what I believe.

I have decided: being good is just a fable,

I just can't 'cause I'm not able. I'm gonna leave it to the Lord.

V2

So forget the game of being good in your self-righteous pain

'Cause the only good inside your heart is the good that Jesus brings.

When the world begins to see you change, don't expect them to applaud;

Just keep your eyes on Him, and tell yourself, "I've become the work of God!"

And I'm determined to write some music for this song, because I think the lyrics are incredible!

Here's a verse or two about this.... and worrying...

“Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be. “Your eye is a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is good, your whole body is filled with light. But when your eye is bad, your whole body is filled with darkness. And if the light you think you have is actually darkness, how deep that darkness is! “No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? “And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs.Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today."

-Matthew 6:19-34 (New Living Translation)

So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.

I Peter 5:6-7 (New Living Translation)

Christian One-Liners

-Don't let your worries get the best of you; remember Moses started out as a basket case!

-Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pew!

-Many folks want to serve God, but only as Advisors.

-It is easier to preach ten sermons then it is to live one.

-The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose... but mosquitos come close!

-When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there.

-People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.

-Oppurtunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your door forever.

-Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you wouldn't belong there.

-If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one that it has.

-God, Himself, does not propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?

-Some minds are like concrete. Thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

-Peace starts with a smile.

-I don't know why some peoplechange churches; what difference doesit make which one you stay home from?

-A lot of church members who are singing 'Standing on the Promises' are just sitting on the premises.

-We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.

-Be ye fishers of men. You catch them - He'll clean them.

-Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.

-Don't put a question mark where God put a period.

-Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.

-Forbidden fruits create many jams.

-God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

-God grades on the cross, not the curve.

-God loves everyone, but probably prefers'fruits of the spirit' over 'religious nuts!'

-God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

-He who angers you, controls you!

-If God is your Co-pilot - swap seats!

-Prayer: Don't give God instructions-- just report for duty!

-The task ahead of us is never asgreat as the Power behind us.

-The Will of God never takes you towhere the Grace of God will not protect you.

-We don't change the message, the message changes us.

-You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.

-The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

I really gotta start postin more often!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!! Time has FLOWN by! Can you believe it? I have so much to tell, and not enough time! It's August 7th, and I officially only have 12 hours of work left! (1.5 days) I finished up my last day at the childcare last night, and tomorrow night I will be heading to my home in the Smoky Mountains!

Since my last post, a lot has happened! Last Friday I paid the last bills for our apartment in NC and paid our official first month's rent for our new apartment (yay!) and once I got home from the post office and counted my money.... I HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO VISIT JUSTIN!!! So, I called my supervisor and asked if I could take the weekend off, and since she is AMAZING and knows how much I missed him, she said, "GO! Do NOT call me until Monday afternoon!" I hit the road, and made it to TN in record time! I got there at about 8:30ish, and on the way there Justin called me, but he didn't know I was on my way, so I had to keep all my joy to myself and pretend like I was miserable without him for another week! I arrived at his job RIGHT after he went off break, so I looked ALL over for him, eventually I lost hope and walked outside and as I went out the doors and glanced behind me... there he was! So I started walking towards him, and when he realized who I was a HUGE grin spread across his face and he said, "What are you doing here!?" He was so excited, and kind of bummed because I had ruined what would have been his suprise of visiting me on that following Wednesday! I beat him to it, lol. I headed back to the apartment until he got off and we had an AMAZING weekend together. I missed him SO much!

I headed home Sunday afternoon, and have been at my inlaws since then. My father in law went to TN on Wednesday and picked Justin up so he could come and see Nanny (suprised her!) and spend some quality time here before we both are officially TN residents! We're going out to dinner tonight with my parents AND having burgers with the inlaws.

I have a job interview at a law firm for a receptionist position on Monday afternoon, I'm nervous and excited, so pray that I get that job! Well, I think that's about it for me, atleast in a summary! I'm sure there will be many new updates in the future!

Been Awhile!

I haven't posted in a while, but I've been pretty busy. I haven't seen Justin since the 20th and I miss him like CRAZY! He starts his orientation for his job today, and then he'll get to start work in the next couple of days. I can't wait till I get to go home to see him! This week I am staying at my inlaws house while they are on vacation, it's kind of nice to be by myself for a while. I was tired of my brother always having a bipolar attitude with me, and even though he's gone this week, I just needed to get away. I've been working like crazy, I haven't had a day off in well like a week. There's 8 of us on staff, but only a few of us are actually willing to work. What's the point in having a seasonal summer job, if you don't even work? It's so aggravating, I would love to have just one day off this week so I can catch up on my sleep. I'm soooo tired, and I can't stand when people act like they're better than everyone else and don't show up. That makes the rest of us have to work more, and it's tiring.

Well, as of today there are 11 days until my last day at work and 12 days until I move HOME! I have an interview at a law firm on that following Monday for another receptionist job and I'm praying that it's God's will for me to get this job. It would be a great job to start with in TN! I'm praying hard!

That's all I feel like typing today, maybe more will come later in the day. God Bless!

I just love this verse... so I'm gonna share it again.

"The joy of the Lord is my strength!"
-Nehemiah 8:10