Rough Week

I really haven't had a great week. One thing I hate about being pregnant is how emotional it makes me, all my feelings and emotions become overpowering sometimes and this week has been the worst week I've had in quite a while. Boogie is very much like me, she is stubborn, headstrong, and all of that on top of being a toddler who struggles to communicate what she wants (despite having a huge vocabulary) equals a little girl who is absolutely miserable most days. She fights me to take naps (and while some have given me the advice to NOT fight her on this, I have to disagree... if I don't fight her she doesn't sleep, if she doesn't sleep she is grumpy all day, this in turn ends in a frustrating fight to get her to sleep at night. If I don't fight her to sleep at night she stays up ALL night, NO joke.), she is at an age where she is trying to hold her own and test me... slowly she is learning that when mommy says "NO." it means no, but it's a struggle. Time-outs are a frequent commodity in our household... but I'm determined that spanking is not going to happen in our family and that peaceful parenting is the way to go. What scares me is how violent she is with herself when she gets frustrated. She bangs her head against walls and on the floor, she scratches, smacks, and pinches herself... all in frustration. I have been good about remaining calm, comforting her and talking to her... but it's hard.

Beyond that however, Boogie is a good girl... really. She's so smart, she learns so much just in one day and is just getting to be such a big girl. But as much as I love her, I will say that even though I enjoy being with her and having her company all the time... I need more adult interaction. We are a one car family right now, it's not really a choice, it's just the way it has to be right now. On top of that in an apartment in another building beside us a new family moved in with a pit bull. Now, before I go on... I don't believe all pit bull's are bad or mean or dangerous. This dog however has been let outside without a restraint multiple times and has attacked people and a CHILD in our neighborhood and NOBODY has called the cops on them. I have called but according to them, unless I witness an incident first hand then there's nothing I can do. So, therefore I am terrified to take my child on a walk, take her outside to play, or even just a walk down to our mailbox to check the mail. Combine that with Justin taking the car to work (because he gets up VERY early) and you have a mommy and daughter who are stuck in an apartment and MISERABLE. It's taking a toll on me, and it's obviously taking a toll on my little girl. I don't know what to do anymore... we're just stuck. I'm hoping and praying that when our lease is up in March (which is TOO long from now) that we will be able to find a house with 3 bedrooms to rent... I need a yard for Boogie to run in and an oasis that I feel free to walk outside in. I'm over all this... I'm SO ready to have this baby, get through the holidays and be done with this neighborhood and done with  being stuck in the apartment ALL the time.

Please pray for me and please pray for my daughter... I hope that she can start communicating a little better and get rid of some of the frustrations she feels.